Randomness again - writing, paramore,pet peeve on music fans, Pandora, sadness sort of, Dexter

 So here I am again, 1:56 am, on 6/21/2011, having really nothing to do. Luckily this time I am writing from my handydandy labtop though so thats good at least. I have written a little bit of my vampire story, I think I might have written a little bit of my suicide story, maybe I will write a little more story wise probably. I am currently listening to The Only Exception by Paramore. Now if you didnt know I am kind of a big fan of Paramore, I really love basicaly anything they have made and of course for me even to try to describe how amazing Hayley Williams voice is would be giving it a discreadit which to do should commdemn you from being a fan of music, I mean say what you want about Paramore as a band,Hayley's voice is one of a kind. That's really why it didn't bother me that the Farro Brothers left. If you want my opinnion ( which I am expecting you do because you are reading my blog) they left because Hayley was getting the fame that she deserved and they were jealous, plain and simple really.  I mean you really can replace anyone in that band besides her, just saying Paramore is Hayley. The Only Exception is probably one of the best songs to come out of the past few years. People are going to judge my comment and say that I'm not a real fan and that I am a mainstreamer ( don't know if that is a word, but don't really care that much) screw them. Everybody is so worried about a song being to "Main Stream" not being inde enough I guess or another one of my favorite people who are intrested in music are those people who when there favorite bands become big stop listening or complain but still listen because in there opinnion that band "sold out". I mean if you need evidence look at Metallica, after they realsed the Black Album many people wined about the fact that they sold out and became Metallica-lite, and that because the album sold a crap ton of records that somehow Metallica sold out. Now I will grant you that the Black Album is not that heavy as Master of Puppets, but I mean how is a band supposed to make any money with out a album selling a crap ton, it just doesn't make any sense to me. But Metallica sort of went to crap after that album so Oh Well. There is nothing I love more in the world then when I am writing something for a story, for the words to just seem right. I know that sentence probably didn't make any sense,but for me I think that anyone who is a writer in somewhere and not published sort of has a lingering feeling that what they are writing is shit. I mean once you get publish and sell some copies I imagine that it probably gets easier because you know that someone out there will read your book. But that moment when I am writing something and I just look at it and it seems so write, I really can't explain it enough. Now listening to Pandora. God that is possibly the greatest invention in the world, the greatest invention to come along since........Hot Pockets probably haha. efully that doesn't seem like a plug, I'm just saying. Love kind of sucks sometimes. Really what sucks about it is loving but really not getting it back, the idea doesn't not suck at all, like I have said before and its kind of cliche but oh well, Love makes the world go around, but when you don't have it, it is sort of like a giant hole in yourself that needs to be filled. I am sort of in Love with the romantic idea of love, not to say it doesn't exsist or anything, it's just different for everyone. I hate the theory that marriage is archaic, I know a lot of stars have said that but whats archaic about. Granted I have said before that I don't know if I will get married, Marriage in all the right form should be the greatest thing in the world, these two people are telling each other that they love each other so much that they are promiseing to God or who ever else that they won't cheat and they will be there for them forever. Now that doesn't happen all the time, but the fact that it does still gives me hope. I am going to end this by saying that if you are not watching the show Dexter, you should start, well that is if you love amazing storylines, supber acting and a show that is breaking boundrays. Just Saying. Well See ya

Randomness-long

So I really dont have a plan set out for this blog, its currently 2:09 in  the morning, in Illinois and I am up for many of reasons, and I thought that since I cant really write a story on my labtop, I might as well write in my blog. Maybe this will prove to be better then the rest cause I am really just going off of anything, maybe it will really suck, oh well. So I am listening to The Script's For the First Time, The Script is a band that to me many people are on the fence about weather they like them or not. One thing I always hear is a debate weather they are pop, alt rock, or many other labels that people like to put on bands. I dont really think it matters. I personal am a believe in music, just music. What I mean by that is I could honestly care less weather something is Pop or Heavy Metal or Grunge, to me music is music, it all inspires me. I personal believe that their songs are incredible written and that O Donoghue's ( got to love the irish) voice is amazing. Though their songs do make me incredible depressed when I listen to them at this time in the morning. I guess I just wish I didnt feel so lonely you know, dont get me wrong I love life. I love my friends, I love my famliy at times, I wish I got to see some friends more but you know what are you going to do, I love how much I have been able to write recently something I havent been able to do in a long time. It's I have always really felt like I'm missing something, as if I have a huge hole in me and I just need something to fill it I guess, I dont really know how to explain it. I'm not depressed, but I am. I'm just waiting on that person you know to come along, or  I dont even know really. I dont like being that guy who is just a friend, I want to be more I guess. Thats another problem I deal  with though, wanting to be more. I dont really have a high self esteem, I have always wanted to be something more than I am, not really that I want to change my self, because I do love who I am right now. Just I want to meet my potential at ....everything really. Now I am listening to Train Marry Me, sort of masochistic I guess, but I mean I think everyone just gets into that mood where you really just want to be sad. Marriage has never been important to me really. I'm not saying that the idea of loving one person for every is stupid ( quiet the opposite really) it's just, what does Marriage really mean in the end, so you take my last name, woo hoo. I am not oppose to getting married, but if I never did and just lived with a girl I loved, I am fine with that. Now its Maroon 5 Wont Go Home Without You. I have always love the idea of romance really, as dumb as that sounds. The Idea that too people, out of all the people in the universe, can find each other and love each other with the love that people do, it kind of is amazing to me. Which then comes my belief in god. My view really differs with the Church, but I still consider myself a Christian. I just cant deal with that fact that there are many people out there who cant be happy because someone thinks that Christianity goes against it. I believe in Gay rights ( thought not gay, just believe in love like I said), I dont think people who commit Suicide get a instant sentence to hell ( not that I think its a good idea, life is deffiently worth living) and I dont think  that because you believe in a different religion, you may go to hell because of the big wheel of religion that some thing we are playing. But I do believe in a being that created us, and that he is looking out for us. That doesnt mean he is the proverble glove catching us when ever something goes wrong. And it doesnt mean that are lives are predestined really. I think that we all have many paths in front of us, but its are choices that mark are destiny. Now its the Doctor Who theme. By the way if you are a Scifi fan, I recommend watching Doctor Who. It is a brillant show, that if you didnt know has been on for ever. The writing has been amazing latley and Matt Smith is doing an amazing job as the Doctor, probably the third best behind Tennant and Baker. Well I guess this is where I end my huge rant, and since I am bad at endings I will do this
Goodbye